Archive for the 'Getting Around' Category

Book review: Twin Set

Published
by
twinutero
on July 31, 2008
in Blogging & writing, Books, Diapers & potties, Fair & green, Feeding, Getting Around, Getting Help and Sleep
. 4 Comments

I read this book with a twinge of nostalgia – and nausea.

My twins have now outgrown all-night breast-bottle feedings, infant bouts of inexplicable crying and multiple poops a day. The toddler years are not exactly peaceful, but that sickening sleep deprivation and round-the-clock care of the first year is over. Reading Twin Set brought back both the difficulties of those first few months as well as the sheer amazement of giving birth to, and caring for two tiny twins.

Twin Set is a practical guide to pregnancy, birth and the first years of parenting twins. The book doesn’t aim to be a comprehensive guide to parenting in general. If you want details on prenatal care, breastfeeding or toilet training, you’ll have to supplement with other books. But Twin Set does a good job of highlighting differences between parenting twins and parenting singletons. And as mothers of twins know, almost everything is different: pregnancy, birth, post-natal care (both for you and the babies), feeding, bathing, getting out of the house, discipline, starting school – and everything in between.

The best part of this book is that the advice is not simply the authors’ opinion but was gathered through a survey. According to the introduction, the authors surveyed 300 mothers of twins “from around the country” (presumably the US). The scientist in me wanted to know much more about this survey: how it was conducted; what questions were asked; how the mothers were chosen etc. Still, there is wisdom among 300 mothers, and that shows in the book.

Twin Set would be most useful for parents about to give birth to twins. No one is reading just after the birth, and within a year or so you will have figured it all out anyway. But for the parents-to-be there are many useful insights: just how difficult bathing two slippery, crying infants can be; the importance of recording all feeding and pooping in the first few months because you’ll forget who did what and when; that grocery shopping will never be as quick and easy, partly because most shopping carts have only one kid’s seat.

I do have a couple of gripes with the book.

The information is very (although implicitly) US-centered. Some things, like a “Snap ‘N Go” or leaving your kids in the car while you run back to the house, may not make sense outside America.

I also got tired of the book’s cutesy language and general dumbing-down. Consultant pediatricians, for instance, are called “Mommy Doc” and “Daddy Doc”. Really, we can handle a real name and title! And I’ve yet to meet a mother who would spend precious alone-time getting a manicure or doing word-puzzles.

My biggest gripe was with the book’s slant on the environment. Buying bottled water by the case-load (or at all) is simply irresponsible. Trying filtering. And, sorry, teaching your kids to play with empty toilet rolls does not negate thousands of disposable diapers in the land fill. Yes, there is debate on cloth versus disposable diapers (see The Great Disposable Diaper Debate) but telling parents to just “stop worrying” rather than make a conscious and informed decision seems, again, irresponsible (as is failing to disclose Twin Sets partnership with Pampers!).

Gripes aside, this is a useful and realistic book for parents embarking on the head-spinning adventure of raising multiples.

(Thanks to Random House for the review copy.)

Ten tips for international travel with kids

Published
by
twinutero
on March 30, 2008
in Getting Around
. 0 Comments

We recently traveled (moved actually) from Canada to South Africa with three children under four years old. Here are ten tidbits of wisdom I learned along the way:

1. Start paper work early. Everyone needs a passport now, from newborns up. That means getting passport quality photos and that means, realistically, several trips to the photographer. Small children don’t like to perch on a high stool and have a flash go off in their face. Getting photos that the passport office will accept is therefore a chore. We also needed visas – a different form, a different office and more photos. Get at least four copies of ID photos and leave plenty of time for the bureaucracy to do its work.

2. Get proof of custody. In Canada there are “long form” and “short form” birth certificates. Only the long forms include names of parents. We needed the long form to get visas – an extra step that took time and money. (Ontario guarantees delivery of a birth certificate within five business days if you pay $65 and choose their “premium online delivery” option. Otherwise, the process can take months.) On the topic of custody, you might also check the Government of Canada’s publication International Child Abductions. Just in case….

3. Get vaccinated – expect trauma. My GP was unable to tell us what vaccinations we needed to travel to Cape Town so we consulted a travel doctor. He advised Hepatitis A/B and rabies shots. Hep A/B is a series of three needles, as is rabies. That’s six needles per child, times three children – eighteen needles. It has not been fun. It has not been cheap either. Medical treatment for traveling purposes is not covered by our provincial medical plan. Rabies shots are particularly expensive, about $180 per needle. Also, Hepatitis vaccinations are given over a six month period, so plan ahead.

4. Get an international driver’s license. Foreign licenses may be valid for a time, but they eventually expire and getting your license renewed from abroad can be a real pain. I’ve also been advised by the Canadian consulate in South Africa that insurance companies aren’t partial to foreign licenses and might try to avoid payment if you’re in an accident without a local or international license.

5. Travel by night. We took two overnight flights: Halifax to London; then London to Cape Town. It was the most direct route we could find, but was still over thirty hours of travel. We left at midnight, with the kids in their PJs, hoping they’d act like any other night and sleep. That flight was brutal, I have to say. We got a day room at an airport hotel in London. While it was expensive, it allowed everyone to shower and sleep. It was worth it. The next flight, twelve hours long, was a breeze in comparison. The kids slept most of the way and arrived in South Africa ready to go. Based on other, shorter trips we have done, traveling by night was the right choice.

6. Sedate the children. Okay, I didn’t tell the whole story in #5. We gave Gravol to Alex and Thomas on the second flight. Just one shot – the recommended dose. I don’t know if it was necessary since Jon slept for nine straight hours without any meds and I’m reluctant to give sedation my wholesale recommendation. But this time, for us, it worked.

7. Travel light. Check your luggage all the way through to your destination, otherwise you’ll be traipsing through airports with cranky kids and toppling stacks of suitcases. Our carry-on bags were also as compact and simple as possible. The kids carried their own backpacks with their blankets, snacks and water. My carry-on was full of wipes, diapers, extra plastic bags, lollipops for take-off and landing, and a few surprise toys to distract when things got raucous. Best travel toys are silent and have few moving parts. We brought books, stickers, magnets (in a tin) and drawing boards. And we watched the in-flight movies – several times.

8. Get a good moving company. I’ve moved many times – and I’ve never found a moving company I like. This move was no exception. Their cost estimate was off by 50% and the shipping took a month longer than predicted. It seems impossible to avoid these little surprises, so I would now expect them. Expect to pay more and wait longer. That means finding an interim place to stay that will accommodate kids, and that kids will accommodate.

9. Share your plans. We started talking about our move as soon as it was confirmed. Thomas knew that we were going “to Africa” and that we’d take a plane to get there. He knew he wouldn’t see his toys for a while, and wouldn’t see his friends for a longer while. Jon and Alex were included in these conversations but were too young to respond. I still don’t know how much they understood, but each transition (house to hotel; hotel to airport etc) went smoothly, as if they knew what we were doing. In any case, it just seems fair to let your kids know if you’re going to travel across the world.

10. Don’t do it for fun. I wouldn’t include international travel with small children as part of a fun family holiday. It’s costly, it’s stressful, and it increases your ecological footprint by several sizes.

Living the life chaotic

Published
by
twinutero
on December 14, 2007
in Coping and Getting Around
. 0 Comments

I got out for a hair cut yesterday. Getting out, even to the hair salon, always freshens my perspective.

There was one other client in the salon. She was stationed beside me, listening intently to advice on how to wear a ponytail without causing hair breakage. She was also stressed – right out of her ponytailed head – about an upcoming two-week vacation. What should she pack? Will the weather cooperate? Did she choose the best destination? Will she gain weight?

I hadn’t been to this salon before, so my stylist asked the obligatory personal questions. Yes, I have children. A three-year-old and two-year-old twins. All boys. Yes, very active. Sleep? No, not much. Not much at all.

Our home? Well, that’s a bit tricky. Technically, we live in Ottawa but we have sold our house there, and all of our belongs are en route to South Africa. Or so we hope. Last we heard, the moving company was searching madly for a shipping container, as if it were something they’d never needed before. So we are here in Nova Scotia (except for my husband, who is in Malaysia) camped out at my parents house.

Moving across the globe with two toddlers and a preschooler? Yes, a little hectic. Wouldn’t have been so bad if Jon hadn’t come down with the flu and kept us up for forty eight hours, or if Thomas hadn’t leaped from a chair and sprained his foot, or if the first winter storm hadn’t wedged the moving truck into the snow bank down the street. Or, of course, if the moving company had a shipping container. Other than that, it’s going pretty well.

Africa? Never been there. Nope, no friends or family….

I don’t know.

I don’t know.

I don’t know.

The woman next to me was silent. I have no idea what she was thinking but in her silence I realised that almost everyone lives a stressful, chaotic life. We just have different reference points, different baselines. Five years ago, I could not have imagined living as I do now. In fact, had I walked into my home, I would have retreated immediately and not very politely before a migraine set in. Non-stop chaos is now a way of life, and our transcontinental move just adds another layer. Our ability to adapt is truly astounding.

To DVD or not to DVD

Published
by
twinutero
on November 27, 2007
in Getting Around and Learning & play
. 0 Comments

We just returned from a road trip – a six hour drive in each direction to visit relatives. That’s twelve hours with two toddlers and a preschooler immobilized in their car seats. We rented a minivan for this excursion, having found the CRV too small and cramped for long trips. The van allows the non-driving parent (usually me) to move among the three kids, delivering snacks, reading stories, retrieving sippy cups (getting thoroughly carsick).

This was the second time we had rented a minivan. The first time, to our surprise, the van came equipped with a DVD player. I object on principle to watching DVDs in the car. I mean, when I was young we learned how to entertain ourselves on long trips and how to appreciate the wonderful scenery. Of course, we weren’t strapped into car seats. I remember “appreciating” scenery while squished against the rear window, or missing scenery altogether because my brothers had me pinned to the car floor. Anyway, we didn’t need video entertainment – we didn’t have video entertainment.

But here we were, the kids, my husband and I, heading out of town with Bob the Builder. As it turned out, we were mighty thankful for the DVD player because, unbelievably, we got lost en route. A six hour drive became a nine hour drive. The kids were oblivious. It could have been a fifteen hour drive. All heads were fixed in position and all eyes were locked onto a tiny screen. We drove through beautiful country (highway 41 for those in Ontario) but the kids couldn’t have cared less. The trip was easy for us, if somewhat mind-numbing for the kids.

Our most recent trip, however, was sans DVD. I’ll admit this was daunting at first. Once you have it, you really believe you can’t live without it. We did, and although it was more work than travelling with a DVD player, it wasn’t a lot more work.

Thomas learned to play “I spy” and even the twins shouted excitedly, “I see it!” And they did see it – everything. The sun going down, the moon coming up, planes taking off, yellow, blue and green road signs, the big city, the lack of big city, the final bridge and final corner to Grandma’s house. I won’t claim they were perfect. There was screaming and fighting and whining. But there was also plenty of quiet time – time when the kids actually noticed their surroundings and found their own entertainment.

All good practice for our transcontinental travel coming up next month….

Taking it on the road

Published
by
twinutero
on September 12, 2007
in Getting Around
. 2 Comments

We’re moving. From Ottawa, Canada to Cape Town, South Africa.

I have moved many times in my life - about 25 times in 41 years which must sound compulsive. Most moves were during my student years (of which there were many) as I constantly searched for a better, yet cheaper, apartment. Student moves entailed stuffing a few backpacks, loading books into boxes, or at most, borrowing a friend’s pickup.

Our impending move bears no resemblance to any I have done or even contemplated: a transcontinental move with two toddlers and a preschooler - to a place I know almost nothing about. My husband has lived in Africa, worked there for many years and traveled extensively through many African countries. I, on the other hand, have never set foot on the continent.

The style of my posts may change in the next few months (probably shorter; hopefully more frequent) as we swing into high(er) gear and begin another adventure.