twinutero

I have several books of activities for toddlers. They describe creative, educational games and crafts, often involving the judicious application of finger paint, glitter or glue. There are times for these activities. Times when you and your kids are well-rested and in good moods, when you can devote your full attention from beginning to end, and when there are no urgent chores to be done.

Life is not always like that, especially with multiples.

So here, in no particular order, is my list of activities for those other times when you really need to pay the bills, go to the bathroom, scrape last night’s dinner off the floor – or when you’re just too exhausted or fed up to get out the “craft box”.

None of these activities is irresponsible, of course. At worst, they’re just counter-productive, ultimately creating more work. But sometimes, for a few precious moments of peace, it’s worth it.

1. The phone – the one that works. From birth, kids seem able to distinguish functional phones from decoys. Working phones are always more attractive. By the time our first son was one, he had quietly destroyed both the household phone and my cell phone. We’ve since manged to keep all phones intact although not, I admit, out of curious little hands.

2. Baby Einstein. I have read several articles debating the educational benefits of Baby Einstein and other forms of “edutainment”. I have no illusions that my kids are getting an intellectual boost by sitting in front of Baby Mozart. In fact, I wonder more about the harm than the benefit. But there’s a reason these DVDs are called “Baby Crack”. They’re transfixing. They also last just long enough to get the dishes washed.

3. Cheerios. The edible version of Baby Einstein: Kids love it; the manufacturers say it’s good for them; and I’d like to think so.

4. The Kleenex box. During a particularly long and restless wait in the doctor’s office, my 10- month old spotted a Kleenex box above the examining table. He amused himself by pulling out one Kleenex after another, until the box was empty and the doctor (who was not amused) finally arrived. Never fails with young toddlers.

5. The clean laundry basket. Same principle as the Kleenex box, I guess. The thrill of flinging what was carefully folded. Works best with two kids.

6. The kitchen sink. This is for toddlers who are steady on their feet and hydrophilic. Fill the sink with plastic cups and spoons, turn on the tap and have the mop handy.

7. Cars and paint. Cars make better painting tools than brushes, it seems. Perhaps it’s the seamless way they roll off the paper, onto the table and then onto the floor, making fascinating track marks all the way. For non-paint eaters only.

8. Instant pancake mix. Tastes pretty bad (even when made according to directions) and really, really sticks to counter-tops, but satisfies a toddler’s urge to cook with remarkably few ingredients.

9. Get naked. The kids, not me. This seems to relieve crankiness at almost any time.

10. Just lie down. My husband taught me this one. It works particularly well in the late afternoon when everyone is tired. Grab a pillow and lie on the floor. The kids love the close-up attention and I get a rest (sort of).